Philosophy and Hope

The most argued subjects of today usually revolve around something philosophical.

Here lately, my English class has been focused on "the reason for life and being". I've found a lot of the things we discuss interesting, and actually have connected some of it to my own life here lately. So... blog time. ;)

First: Happiness.

My Mom asked me not long ago if I thought that a person could make themselves happy or if happiness had to come from something other than ourselves. Her question made me think. I used to believe that person could make themselves happy, and that happy was a daily decision that a person could make to benefit their own lives. When I got into nursing, I learned a lot about mental health disorders. I realized that the people with conditions such as depression don't choose to be depressed. I learned that sometimes things happen in peoples lives, and those things leave scars that are sometimes never healed. If people had the choice, then it seems as if everyone everywhere would be happy all of the time. Now, I think that most of happiness has to come from around you. Whether you like where you are, who you are, your friends, your family, your school, your job, etc. etc. etc. makes a large impact on how you wake up and feel every morning. In this though, there is trouble. If a person wakes up and realizes "Wow, I'm not happy..." that doesn't mean they should abandon things in their lives to search for something that will bring them happiness. In that case, there would be no such things as family, as friendship, or any otherwise stable things in peoples lives. For most all human beings, happy times will be more sparse than sad/bad/mad times, and most of that is an unstoppable force. So this brings up the question: where, when, and how do you decide if you are good where you are and need to make the best of it or do you need to move on and find some new reason to be happy again? I know that God is the only keeper of true happiness and peace, but that also brings me to question whether or not as a race humans are meant to be happy? As Christians, are we cursed to live with the hands we are dealt in this life to make Heaven seem just that much more indescribably good? Or is it really that we bring unhappiness upon ourselves each and every day and in that have some internal flaw? I have heard many sermons on how, as Christians, we are to delight in pain and suffering we endure for the Lord, but what about the rest of it? The pain we get when we lose a friend? The pain we get when we fail at what we've dreamt of doing our entire lives? The pain we feel when it seems as if we are alone in this world?

I keep hope in everything that the Lord does works out for the best of his children, and that all things are according to His plan. That is the only way to satisfy all of the "whys" and "why nots" that will forever be a part of our lives. I become convinced more and more everyday that God truly, deeply, indescribably loves all of his children, and that his hands are at constant work in our lives. So to me, as I have endless questions running through my head, I put a block of trust in their path and know that my God is forever watching over me.

Second: Change

We are forever changing beings. Every day I hear someone say something about "Well, I've not changed, it's them/that/there that has." That's truly wrong. Everything around all of us and inside all of us is under constant fire and turmoil and that causes us to change. I look around at the few true friends I still consider my true friends, and can't believe how much change I see in all of them. Some of it outwardly, some of it situationally, but most of in internally and somewhat spiritually. We all can't help it. It's human nature. And the funny thing about it is, we all live in denial that it is truly US that is different. Even when someone denies "No, I know I've changed" they feel a sense of pride in themselves that in some way they are still right. Right in that they way they've changed is the correct way to change, the best way to change. Or even just right to admit they have changed to look honorable and truthful to friends and family. We refuse to really sit an analyze ourselves into the depths of all our defects and glitches, and instead make everything about ourselves okay in our heads. There are exceptions of course, as there are to everything in this life, but most people cherish themselves in a way that may not outwardly appear but is inwardly present. Else wise, we wouldn't care if anyone hurt our feelings, left us alone, said mean things about us... we believe that there is something in us that is good and doesn't deserve the treatment we quite often all receive.

Change occurs in everything- in out appearance, in our speech, in our senses, in our hearts, in our minds, and even in our souls. Then how do people hang on to each other for years upon years of time? When we become friends with someone/date someone/marry someone, we decide we love them and want to be around them because of who they are (with still few exceptions). We feel that the people we associate ourselves with compliment us in some sort of way. How then does someone stay "friends forever" with someone? Or married to someone their entire lives? What if the change in a person is such that it does not fit with your own change, and there again you can't be happy with them anymore?

I have lost a lot of friends in my lifetime solely because of change. The friends I have now have decided, just like I have now, to stick with me as I change and as they change. So I guess in that sense, it all comes down to choice. You have to choose whether memories of someone or feelings that you used to have about someone are worth hanging on to them if none of the good stuff ever happens again. Change is in a sense choice.

I consider myself a good friend. I know that my friends don't know how much I truly love them, because sometimes I dont jump up to do things with them as I guess I should do sometimes. But I do love them, and if you are my friend now, then know that I have chosen to be your friend and made that commitment to you, and will be your friend until you no longer want me as one. I will never abandon anyone in my family or anyone of my friends no matter what they may do to me or period, if in some way it is still possible for me to hang on to them. It has to boil down to an understanding sometime, and a mutual appreciation that will persevere when everything else is over and gone.

Happiness and Change are in a way part of everything in everyones lives. If it weren't true, then we simply wouldn't and couldn't exist.

Sometimes, I personally feel like I don't have much going for me, or I don't have as much to look forward to as I have to dread. Honestly, that is probably true. The happy times always seem to be fleeting while bad times tend to linger on your heels for a while. I am really more accepting of those things that life may throw my way however. I feel like with comfort given from the Lord, the good memories, the happy recollections, and the great things (no matter how few or how many) that are still to come in my life, I can never lose hope.

This blog reminds me of a song... I seem to post a lot of song lyrics on here. Haha! :)

Praise You in this Storm

Casting Crowns

I was sure by now,God, that You would have reached down

and wiped our tears away,

stepped in and saved the day.

But once again, I say amen

and it's still raining

as the thunder rolls

I barely hear You whisper through the rain,

"I'm with you"

and as Your mercy falls

I raise my hands and praise

the God who gives and takes away.

And I'll praise you in this storm

and I will lift my hands

for You are who You are

no matter where I am

and every tear I've cried

You hold in your hand

You never left my side

and though my heart is torn

I will praise You in this storm

I remember when I stumbled in the wind

You heard my cry to You

and raised me up again

my strength is almost gone how can I carry on

if I can't find You

and as the thunder rolls

I barely hear You whisper through the rain

"I'm with you"

and as Your mercy falls

I raise my hands and praise

the God who gives and takes away

I lift my eyes onto the hills

where does my help come from?

My help comes from the Lord, the maker of heaven and earth

I lift my eyes onto the hills

where does my help come from?

My help comes from the Lord, the maker of heaven and earth