Day 16: Another picture of yourself.
On another note, school starts back soon. I have SUCH mixed feelings about going back. I really want to see my friends, meet some new people, decorate my room, but I really don't want to go back to classes and living there all week. :( I know I felt this same way last year... I am such a Mama's/Daddy's/Nana's/Overall family girl that I can't remember how it was to not have them around me constantly. I guess it's a double edged sword being so close to your family... it makes things like college harder than they would be if you weren't. I honestly feel like if I could take Abby I'd be okay! Haha!
But right now, I'm dreading the summer coming to a close. I know that a lot of this has to do with last year and what a rough time I had with all of my classes, and I know that it won't happen again this year, but I kind of feel like I'm a freshman all over again. I really dread having to adjust again. :/ I know this makes me sound like a big kid, but I really am, and I'm not ashamed. I love my family, and wouldn't apologize for any time I spend with them. This seems to insult a lot of my friends, but it's just who I am. I hate that there aren't many people I can relate to now days as families don't seem to be as close as they used to be. Another thing about this summer coming to a close: this is the last summer that I will ever know like this. This is essentially the end of my summers. Next summer, I won't be having surgery so I'll be working and hopefully doing an externship at Mission along with taking some summer classes. Brenna plans on getting a job, Mom has a new job where she won't have Summers off... I just can't imagine having stuff to do all the time during the summer and not laying out at the pool for long days like we all have been able to this Summer. As goes growing up I guess. You have so much you have to lose and part with, and so much more you have to do- but then you have so much to look forward to- a future job, marriage, family of your own... AHH! Haha! Everything in this life just seems so Bittersweet. Same way about school, it's going to be fun to go back and meet the freshies and new neighbors, and to have the hall meetings and new classes and new teachers and etc. etc. while you have to have the pain of school work and stress.
I try so hard to hang on to where I'm at in life, to stay as free as I am now- to hold onto my little sister while she grows right out of my hand, to spend time with my Mom, Dad, and Nana while I know in a few short years I'll be moving out and into a family of my own. Askhasdhjhsd! Now is the time when I most need to rely on God on his path for me and what he wants to come out of my time here. I really can't wait to see what he has in store for me, but I very much am content at where I am right now.
I'm definitely going to be praying for His peace in these coming weeks- for me, for my parents, for my sister, for my Nana, and for anyone else having the back to school jitters like me.
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